


with us, there is no beginning

by asterial



Series: together/apart [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: (the last line is a bit angsty ngl), Canon Compliant, Drabble, First Kiss, Fluff, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Romance, lapslock
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-13
Updated: 2020-05-13
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:02:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24168538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asterial/pseuds/asterial
Summary: "we knew it when the bickering turned into awkward silences, when we caught each other's stare from across the court, when we were walking back home alone and hinata had nearly slipped and fell and i had grabbed onto his hand and didn't let go until we parted.and we especially knew the first time we kissed."
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Series: together/apart [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1744342
Comments: 4
Kudos: 38





	with us, there is no beginning

**Author's Note:**

> you could probably read this without reading the [first](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24113218) part of this series but i would very much appreciated it if you do <3

i'd like to pinpoint the exact time this started. this, being the subtle glances, the knowing looks, the soft touches, the kissing in places we thought no one would ever find us. this agreement (for the lack of a better word) we have, that we could find solace in each other, even if we don't exactly understand (we never really do).

when i noticed it, however, now _that's_ a different story.

"kageyama," sugawara-san had called. it was the day of the last time we had ever practised with the third years; all teary-eyed and emotional. more so on hinata's part than anyone. he'd been sobbing in the background, along with tanaka-san and yachi-san, a distraught azumane-san trying to console them (albeit unsuccessfully).

"yes?" i had replied.

sugawara-san had smiled a smile i couldn't really understand, like he knew something i didn't but i should've (he does that a lot), and he says, "good luck with hinata."

at the time, i didn't think much of it. i had thought it wasn't about anything important so i threw him a smile and said, "thanks."

i'm pretty sure he knew i had no idea what he meant.

the first time i realized it, hinata had a sprained ankle.

he was in denial for the most part, putting up a front and acting tough as if he could still practise, still play volleyball. 

"your ankles are literally twisting the wrong way, sit _down,_ " i had said. ennoshita-san had assigned me to bring hinata to the infirmary but the orange head just would not _stand still._

"but i'm fine!" he had pushed, "there's no time for this. we have a practise match in two days, i can't afford to slack," hinata had tried to argue.

"maybe if you weren't so reckless in your jumping, you could've been _fine_ ," i shot back, grabbing a fistful of his hair.

" _ow, ow_ , hey! stop abusing the patient!" hinata pushed away my hand.

i sighed, furrowing my eyebrows at the sight of hinata trying to fix his hair. god, he was helpless.

i thought the conversation would end there. that i'd leave, get back to practise, toss to a few of the new spikers and go home. but no, i didn't. hinata had grown quiet, scarily so because hinata never shut up about anything. so to see him like that was something new.

"i need to get better."

hinata had always said those words. and hinata was nothing if not constantly changing, evolving, getting _better_ and it showed. so much so that even now, with a sprained ankle and probably a lot of pain, he still thinks about growth; what to change and how to change them. 

"you wouldn't understand," he started, "i hate to say it but you're already so skilled and talented, you get to do half the work. but me? the only thing i can do is practise so that i can get better, so that i can get stronger. something like this?" he points to his feet, "this stops me from doing that, and i can't let that happen."

i had looked at hinata then, eyes empty, almost sad, sitting in the infirmary with bandages around his foot. if only he could see himself. 

"you're wrong," i spat out. 

"what?" hinata asked, eyebrows furrowed.

"you're wrong, i _do_ understand. more so than anyone," i replied, "you want to get better but being reckless and not taking care of yourself is not going to help you either."

hinata had looked up at me in disbelief. and i wouldn't blame him for doing so, if i'm being honest.

"for now, just _lie down._ take care of your ankle and recover quickly. the court will be waiting for you when you come back, anyway."

i was speaking as a teammate, as a _partner,_ but all of the sudden, hinata had smiled, that bright smile of his that just lights up the entire room i almost try to look away, and for a moment i entertained the idea of being something more to him in the back of my mind.

"thanks, kageyama," he said, almost shyly.

"be careful next time, dumbass."

something had changed that day, and i'm sure hinata had noticed it as well, because the next few days he felt _strange._ like i was seeing him in a different light and i couldn't look away even though i had no idea why i was so drawn to him i the first place.

and it was fine for a while; not knowing what anything meant. it wasn't like anything noticeably changed, we still bickered and fought with each other like normal. hinata had soon fully recovered from his sprain and got back into practise like it had never happened. 

but something _did_ change, whether or not we noticed it at the time, whether or not we wanted anything to change, whether or not we even had the choice to change anything in the first place, it did. 

we knew it when the bickering turned into awkward silences, when we caught each other's stare from across the court, when we were walking back home alone and hinata had nearly slipped and fell and i had grabbed onto his hand and didn't let go until we parted.

and we especially knew the first time we kissed.

it was like any other day. practise had just finished and hinata and i were assigned to close up. we were left alone together in the clubroom, changing clothes when we caught each other staring.

it wasn't _weird,_ i don't think. we've changed in front of each other before and we didn't even think twice about it most of the time. 

the difference was that it was after we noticed this (whatever _this_ was) and being alone together like this just didn't feel the same way anymore.

"kageyama," hinata had broken the silence, and thank god he did, i would've never been able to.

hinata walked closer to me with an expression i had never seen before, i could only freeze.

he grabbed ahold of my hands. he had done this before, but something about this felt different. his hands felt like a light weight, gripping onto mine shyly, almost delicately, asking for something. his eyes were looking up at mine with a stare so soft it felt impossible that ii was the one he was looking at. his fingers were playing against mine even though i couldn't really see them. i couldn't bring myself to look away from his eyes and before i knew it hinata's face was only inches away from mine.

the last thing i thought was that he looked adorable while blushing.

it was a short kiss, probably lasted three seconds at most with no tongue. it was the epitome of a first kiss; innocent, timid, beautiful. hinata had immediately turned away in embarrassment after pulling away and i could only stand there in disbelief at what happened.

so, perhaps that's not how it all started. because if we're being honest, it started long before that, long before either of us could even notice. 

but it ended before either of us could even realize what it all meant.

**Author's Note:**

> i just really wanted to write something in kageyama's pov this time ^^
> 
> talk to me on [twt](http://twitter.com/maqickal/)!


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